11/4/24-11/10/24

Reflections from this past week:

My photography in relation to self identity is a never ending puzzle. Using a point and shoot so much this year has left me questioning why I need anything else. I do this for fun, I do this as a hobby, and maybe if I’m lucky, or good enough, I will sell some things. I think up to this point I felt I needed to attain a certain level of skill to be respected among my peers, or people who I wanted to consider my peers. Not in a comparitive toxic way either, just to show the outside world, and in a way myself, that I’m capable of taking an interesting picture. Now I don’t care too much about that, and I’ve lost interest in what drove me for years, street photography. Candid photos of strangers on the street type of street photography. It’s a foreign thing to me right now. A lot of this year has been filling that void. Yet I still look forward with optimism, knowing that the pictures I take over time continue to be my own.

Social media sucks. It’s devolved so much, like a drug that was once used for recreational purposes is now a full on addiction. I love the artistic side of it, and of course I still love to laugh at all the dumb shit on there (the autistic side of it), but at what point is it too much? That’s where I’m at right now on the whole thing. It’s too much to be consumed without limitations. Especially during a period of time with such tension in the world. I don’t want to be a full time consumer of a platform that in the same 60 seconds I can go from the effects of genocide to a street interview about nothing in particular to someone’s kid looking stupid at the playground. I am so so so good off that and the doomscroll culture it’s become.

Had a conversation about getting old versus feeling old with some friends last night. I reflected on it a good deal in the last twelve hours. I am getting older but I don’t feel old. At one point I felt old. The second half of this year I’ve addressed that. It’s important to check yourself on these things. What makes you feel old versus what makes you feel young. Maybe make a list of both things. There’s middle ground to be had. You do things that make both your mind and body feel young while you age. It’s simple in nature but complex to the individual person. What makes you feel alive? How can you sustain that feeling, etc. Life goes on, with(in) or without you.

All images taken with my Ricoh GR1v, within the last couple weeks.